tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3805581586725799107.post7409710181411751735..comments2023-08-16T03:24:46.578-07:00Comments on Not My Hoarding Mother: You know you were waiting for it... the unidentified 'poo' object update... Lisabethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15732537794621527375noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3805581586725799107.post-21744591694931840682013-04-16T07:53:33.961-07:002013-04-16T07:53:33.961-07:00Thank you for sharing with me, and I am so, so sor...Thank you for sharing with me, and I am so, so sorry you have had to go through that. Thank you for the practical advice as well.<br /><br />Finding her dead and decomposed in a rotting house full of crap, and now, what appears to be biologicals and vermin is my worst, worst nightmare. All six of her cats are medically vulnerable (one has glaucoma and requires drops 4 times a day). <br /><br />For me, I know it will never be truly over... but at least if I outlive her maybe she (and I!) might find some peace. The manipulative, emotional aerobics she does is simply soul-sucking sometimes. <br /><br />((Hugs)) to you!Lisabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15732537794621527375noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3805581586725799107.post-56711147464230187282013-04-11T11:41:45.339-07:002013-04-11T11:41:45.339-07:00I will one day have to deal with my mother's h...I will one day have to deal with my mother's hoarding house. Never in a million years did I expect to have to deal with my brother's hoarding house before that time came. I understand how you feel. With my mother's house, I visit, so I know what I'll be up against, but with my brother, I learned the distinct difference between hoarding, and gross, filthy, extreme hoarding. Nothing can prepare you for what you will one day face if your mother is a gross, filthy hoarder. In the case of my brother, we'd been estranged because of my anger over my mother supporting him financially all these years, (he was 56) thus enabling his hoarding. He was a recluse who kept his windows cardboarded so no one knew how he was living. It was 2 weeks before anyone called authorities to check on him. At that point, the body was so badly decomposed that he was unidentifiable. I drove 12 hours to his Florida home to handle this for my 81 year old mother. In the end, it was a combination of extreme self neglect, alcohol, and hoarding that killed him. He tripped over a pile of his own hoarded stuff, hit his head, fell, and never woke up. This is fresh. Probate on the house is closing today. I also just returned from Texas where he left a storage unit full of crap which was covered in rat feces. He had 6 cats which were left homeless and confused. They escaped through a hole in the door and to this day I'm trying to find a no kill shelter that will respond to my pleas to go to the house to try to rescue them. The only way to maintain some semblance of sanity if your mother is a filthy hoarder is to look into companies that specialize in gross, filthy, extreme hoarding clean out now, then, look for an insurance company that will cover the cost and get that insurance! The clean out at my brother's was a bio-hazard because of the decomposed body. Then came a second contract for the clean-out. A total of $11,400.00. Prepare now, and look for a company that also provides the emotional support you will need. If you are like me, you'll be motivated by anger for being left with the horrible task you inherit when a hoarder dies. I never imagined facing the horrible ordeal I went through. It started on Feb 3rd, even with the help of a crew, it took 3 weeks to complete the task, and 2 dumpsters the length of the driveway. That was just the house, not the storage unit. In comparison, my mother's hoarding seems much more manageable to me now, because it is not filthy hoarding. I was having marital troubles before this happened so I can't even talk to my spouse about it, which is why I searched for an online support group. I thought it ironic. Before this happened I desperately wanted time away from my husband, I guess I should have been more specific. It sounds weird but despite the horror, it was still time away from him. That was the silver lining. The gross, filthy, disgusting silver lining. Good luck to you. I hope I can help others who are facing this prepare. You can't and shouldn't do it alone. Godspeed. Hang in there.btdthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12063662634455833020noreply@blogger.com