It is time for... From The Mouth Of A Hoarder...

So she has been a LOT worse lately... 'She' being my hoarding mother.

She was talking about petting her one cat (that is about 9 or so) and after a painful, weird, and convoluted-verbal-vomit salad she finally came to the point to the story, one of the cat's canine teeth is broken off.  She then started railing against her estranged sister who she last had in her home summer of 2000.  That is right. Eighteen and half years ago.  She began with the accusation that her sister shut a cat that I grew up with in the door, and ranted that it probably happened at the same time and... 

I cut her off.  I am not even going into that people are not singular natured- if she decides she is done, then the person is the most horrible person ever...  Ugh.  

The cat she was accusing her sister of harming was a kitten when I was twelve.  She died at 21 years of age.  So I was 33.  I am now nearly 50.  So, 17 years ago.  And the alleged injury was discovered probably 5-7 years before that, but after her blow up with her sister she decided it was her.  I broke it down for her like that.  She de-escalated briefly, but then told me tale of the tail (see what I did there?) word for word.  

I also pointed out that her current kitty has been to the vet recently, and that would have been noticed as the gum is swollen.  

She demurred and changed the subject.  That poor cat.  I keep asking her when she is taking it to the vet.   Every time I talk to her...   Now, there is a possibility that none of this is true.  That makes it so hard.  

She is having cataract surgery at the end of the month.  Bet that will be fun for the neighbor (her new wonderful stranger and I suspect, flying monkey).  I hate to tell her, the fall from the pedestal is a hard and fast one.  With that being said, I am glad she has someone to take her.   

Hoarding, no one wins.  No one.  

Looking forward to a new year, because 2018 has been rough!

I am so ready for the opportunity of 2019.  In the last couple of weeks I lost my little aged kitty love.  The one that had been so sick, and was 17-20 years old.  She and I had 7 months together, and although I did not think it was enough, I had to make a hard decision.  I hope it was the right one.  

Of course, my hoarding mother was urging me to stop exploring options and put her down.  Then when my vet and I came to the decision, she endlessly talked about her latest cat that died, and her fears for three of her own.  

Very quickly, I had a board member at a local rescue reach out to me.  She knows that the other cat does not do well without a companion, and my baby was despondent.  She really, really, got close to this kitty. I made the decision to jump, and I adopted a 10 1/2 year old shy girl who is super-obese.  We have our work cut out for us... But we will work on this together.  All of us.  My resident cat has adapted quite well.  When the 'excitement' of that wore off for my hoarding mother... She has 'hit the gas' on manufacturing her own drama.  This includes:

• Calling on a weekend and dramatically intoning her new roof was leaking on the porch and running down a litany of petty complaints about the contractor, and she wants someone to 'make him' pay for fixing it to her satisfaction... Since I run a residential program I would have a magic wand...  I told her to call the Better Business Bureau or take him to small claims court if she could not find it to allow him to correct the issue, which I recommend.  She did not like THAT.
• Stating the next door neighbor is in 'cahoots' with the hated neighbor that moved away, accusing him of the same types of nonsensical acts of theft or vandalism that she accused the 'neighbor in the turn' of.
• Complaining that she expects to be arrested any day due to the interaction she had with the sheriff when she made her last complaint.
• Hyping high drama with her last bone scan results, and then refusing any treatment.  It is not if, it is when, a bone breaks.
• Also hyping to the highest level of bathos that she has a mitral valve prolapse.  She was angry and walked out of her cardiology referral due to the doctor stating it was not an issue, discussing that it was common in her age bracket, not allowing her to perform her 'dog and pony' show.
• She had a neighbor take her to a nearby (larger town) for a consult for cataract surgery.  She was shocked that she had been in there in 2009, and that her cataract had gotten worse in the last 9 years.

I could go into more, but you get the idea.  My mother's neighbor is correct, she wants something to be seriously wrong/critical in nature.  I have remained very low contact, and I get off the phone when she starts her 'scripts' or rumination, ruination, and petty grievances.  

Hoarding.  No one wins.  Happy 2019!