Saturday, November 16, 2019

Until sunbreak and beyond...

I have been so overwhelmed ...

This Thursday I got news that was not the best.  Basically...
I most likely have a brain tumor that will result in death in 1.5 years to 5 years.  I have surgery for the 22nd of this month (next Friday) and I am struggling.  I am the comeback kid, so I am hoping for a miracle, again.  No cancer, not any of the four likely malignant tumors...

I had a seizure on Friday at a business lunch.  Time grows short... 

I told my mother...

Sunday, November 3, 2019

A health challenge

When it rains it seems to pour...

So...  Where do I even start...

After getting better after my stroke, I started getting worse.  I realize that traumatic brain injury, or recovery after said, is not a linear process.  And I finally was being assessed by my neurologist.  

Oh my god...  There is likelihood the of a frontal lobe tumor. I am being scheduled for a PET scan, another MRI, and a brain biopsy.

To be continued ...

Tuesday, August 27, 2019


Just a FYI, Blogger is not letting me reply to comments as a late.  I read all and appreciate comments, but cannot reply.

Humor that does not include my mother...

So... Been way too serious... Time for a brief bit of levity...

So, as you know I moved SOUTH.  I have mostly enchanted by the lizards, frogs, and what-not down here.  I am not anymore.  Remind me to tell you about my baboons-in-South-Africa story sometime...

Anyway, I stopped for gas on my way to work, and I did not take the time to shut the sunroof.  I got gas, admiring the pretty little lizards with yellow heads and orange tails.  You see where this going don't you?  They frolicked about, and some were quite large, 5-6 inches or so. I finished gassing up and went on my way.

I caught movement out my corner of my eye, and I looked, nothing.  I thought I saw something again, but saw nothing.  Now, I have recently had a stroke and TIAs, so I dismissed it as my brain playing tricks on me.

A lizard landed on the console and began hissing at me.  I  decided FUCK THAT NOISE I AM OUT!  I put the SUV in Park and bailed out.  In rush hour traffic in a congested area...  

So, I am contemplating what to do, and turning the SUV and it's requisite payment over to Mr. Lizard looks good when a gentleman stops to help.  He opens the door and the lizard jumps on him and he freaks and shuts the door, the lizard still inside.  He tries again and screams at me to open the passenger door... NO WAY THAT THING IS COMING OUT AT ME!  I refuse.  He releases the hatch, and the lizard gets going while the getting's good.  I thank the gentleman profusely, and get back in and continue my commute. I did
pull over and look through my SUV to ensure the lizard did not have a companion... 

I hit Starbucks for a drink even though I was late for work.

I later learned those lizards are invasive and BITE.  Oh, and  they hiss.  But I already had figured that out.


Wednesday, August 7, 2019

Oh my...

What a whirlwind it has been!

Since I last updated you all I have...

  • Learned of the horrific closing of my former agency.
  • Lost my health insurance due to the closing...
  • Got an offer for the job I wanted.
  • Quit the survival job.
  • Planned and executed over 1,000 mile move while driving two cats.
  • Had a stroke.
  • Began my job. 
Yeah.  You read that correctly.  I was out for a run near my home the 27th when I had a stroke.  The EMTs came and I never want to experience anything so painful and terrifying.  When I could communicate, the right side of my body was numb and and I could not move it.  

Three days later I left to hospital, a friend flew back less than a week later to care for me.  I am so grateful to the good friends I have ...  I miss them terribly.

I am getting better every day.  I had a clot and also some lesions.  It is probably due to the health condition I have, and I most likely will have to for additional testing, like a brain biopsy. 

I did not tell my hoarding mother.  She would start banging the funeral gong for me.  I cannot stand it...

Hoarding...  No one wins.

Monday, June 10, 2019

My 'sine curve' of a life!

Oh what a whirlwind it has been!  To catch you all up:
  • I was hit by a hit-and-run driver.  The driver was not found.
  • I had a wonderful 50th birthday party put on by my dear friends.
  • I interviewed the next day by flying out to the west coast and withstood a 10 hour interview process.
  • I did not get the job, as they wanted someone local and not as expensive.
  • I found out my car was totaled.  And my insurance company totally screwed me over.
  • I went ahead and bought the gorgeous SUV I put a deposit on.
  • I started a 'survival job' in sales.  Four weeks in, 100 miles on my SUV a day, and I have received ZIP in commission. Nada.
  • I interviewed down south, and they have made an attractive offer.  If details can be worked out, the kitties and I will be in a little slice of paradise near the beach.  I have found some place I want to live, discussed breaking my lease, and other logistics.  Now if we can work final details out...
  • My 17 year old cat had to emergency surgery.  Two weeks later, she is at the vet's tonight, she has to have a repeat of the surgery.
  • I have been in physical therapy for a painful and tenacious achilles tendon injury on my right foot.  I fell taking the trash to the dumpster (and had to dumpster dive in a FULL dumpster when I accidentally threw my keys in said dumpster).  I sprained my ankle and broke my foot.  Now I have PT for the other leg.
  • I have had a major illness flare.
  • Two of my dearest friends are getting married.
  • A friend I have only met via FaceTime will be visiting from Australia.
I could go on, but you get the idea.  What does this have to do with my hoarding mother you ask?  Everything.  And nothing.  She has lived in the same place and risks NOTHING.  I have learned from her, and I do not want to spend time just trudging through life only to reach the end and think 'what if'.  I want to live, really live, all of it.  Take the risks, and focus on experiences and that I care about.  And I do, and I will.  

Good night!

Saturday, May 4, 2019

Addendum to 'Why do I try?'

This is too funny, you simply can not make this sh*t up...

I went to the conference I attend in my home state.  It was wonderful, I had a great conference experience and a lovely visit with my dear friend and her husband. 

I decided to drive home Friday night, about a five-plus hour drive.  Long story short, on a lonely, mostly deserted stretch of interstate I was hit by a hit-and-run driver.  I could finish the journey, but my car is hurt.  I will deal with it after my trip to the west coast.  I had even found someone at the conference who was EXCITED to take my car as a donation. Ugh.

Guess that trading it in is my best option if I do not fix it.


The important thing is, I am fine.  Just peeved.